Hello, melodies and soon-to-be melodies. Today is not a Sunday but I couldn’t write ahead without writing this down. It’s an emotional post for me. At this moment it’s like I am penning my heart down on this blog post. I can’t help but cry and feel hurt but proud too. I feel so at peace after writing this one post, I feel like I just said all my emotions to you all and I did what I had to. It’s okay if I get hate for this because I feel at peace right now. I know what he did was wrong but he fought it and came through it and I will do it too. So let’s get this post started, shall we???
This post will be a little emotional for all melodies and a little confusing for non-melodies. But please bear with me because without writing about him I don’t have the guts to move ahead. I can’t leave him behind and I won’t leave him behind. I would urge everyone to be kind to each other and to not hurt each other’s emotions. Everyone can have their own opinion but please put it out in a way that doesn’t hurt anyone. Please be kind and don’t say anything harsh about this post because at the end of the day I am a human being writing about a fellow human being, not a kpop idol, not a star. Today it’s just a girl writing to a boy named Jung Ilhoon.
BTOB is Ilhoon
Ilhoon is BTOB.
~A letter to You From Me.
It took me a lot of effort to start typing. A lot of people are scared that this blog might backfire on me but I think it’s okay because I need to put this out there. I need you to know that it’s okay. That we, melodies, know you didn’t mean to do what you did. We know that you were stressed. We know the countless reasons that made this happen. It’s hard for me to think about the pain the senior melodies went through because I became a melody on 26th December 2020, a day after the heart-wrenching news came out. I found out about your departure from the group and the issue on 6th January. I wouldn’t have found out anything if it wasn’t for my friend who informed me that one of the members of BTOB is in some serious trouble.
As a new melody, I was completely clueless. No idea who to turn to and what to think of the matter. Like so many others, I also thought that maybe you are the bad guy. The guy who hurt the image of the group, who broke the trust senior melodies placed in you. I felt so awkward telling people that I like a group that has a bad guy. A man who did marijuana even after knowing that it’s banned in the country and not good for your health, how can I tell them that??? But I liked the other boys, I really did, I doubted you but never hated you. I was new and clueless so I turned to the obvious things that were available on YouTube. The funny video compilations, the music videos, and most of all, BTOB Diary, BTOB B+, BTOB The Beat.
The case kept going on, the dates kept moving ahead and news started coming in that you did it. But you did it because you were stressed as you started working at a young age and it was pressurizing. There were always videos of former kpop idols who revealed how tough it was for them to survive in the industry and how they ended up quitting in the end, it helped me understand your situation a bit. Then I started watching the videos of BTOB, while watching, I realized how important part you are in the lives of the members. You are their Irunaa!!! The center of the group, the savage evil guy who ruled everyone’s hearts, the man who named the fandom, the man who was in the Top 10 rappers list for his extraordinary rapping skills, the guy who worked hard but stayed true to his family, friends and his members. When you left, members left us signs saying that we should not forget you, then how could I leave you behind when they can’t???
As a melody, I always found solace in the songs but I could only find the peace in it because you were in it. Your rap and your songs touch my heart. I was brought into BTOB by Yook Sungjae but I was turned into a melody through the music and the music was made by ALL OF YOU.
Just because someone did something wrong, should we forget them??? Should we remove them from our lives??? I came late into the fandom, I don’t know what pain everyone went through but when I started getting to know you. I felt the pain too. I felt hurt knowing that soon I won’t have your voice to hear in the songs. That there will be no rap by you in the songs, that there will be no pictures of you with the members anymore. I felt the sharpest pain that there will be no introduction of Jung Ilhoon as a BTOB member.
As you fought your battle, I fought my battle along with the other melodies, a battle where we have to accept that the members love you so much but they won’t be able to say it out loud. A battle that says that Jung Ilhoon is not bad, the pressure made him do it. A battle where we protected you and while protecting you we became scared of losing you although we do know that we have already lost you to the pain you are going through. We lost you to the embarrassment you must be feeling but most of all, we lost you because, in reality, people don’t like giving second chances. As human beings, we know you will always look down on yourself, you will feel scared and maybe even ashamed of hurting us.
I heard you cried and wrote letters of repentance. I don’t want to know about the letters but just hearing that you cried makes me want to cry too.
Ilhoon, there isn’t much I can do for you, there isn’t much I can say to you but as a melody, I accept you as you are. With all your flaws, all your imperfection. I accept you with your past and with your future I accept to support you however you work. I know it’s hard for you but it’s not going to last long. All bad things end one day.
My journey with you started with doubt in you and ended with full trust and respect for you because no matter what people say, you worked equally hard to bring BTOB to the place they are right now. You contributed and served more than you had to and as a melody, I am proud that you are imperfect because nobody is perfect. Not even God!! He up there must have his flaws too. The Titanic was supposed to be the unbreakable ship but it sank too, you are a human being. How can I not expect you to do a mistake???
In the end, I want to say just one last thing. I have seen your brotherhood with BTOB from afar, I don’t know how close you are in real life but the fact that you all are a family shows clearly in the countless videos I have seen. I will keep on supporting them but will never forget supporting you either because a family should always be together.
This post is just for me. If you can relate to it, you know how I feel. I am starting a blog series solely based on BTOB and there is no way I had the guts to leave him behind because be it 6tob supporters or 7tob supporters, we all know that ilhoon had an equal contribution to the group’s achievement until now. If I am writing about them and their achievements, I can’t leave him out, and as a melody, I want to support him. You support him or not is your choice but please don’t be harsh on my choice to support him.
For all the 7TOB supporters, be strong. It’s hard but it’s worth it, just stay strong and wait. After all these bad things era, good things will come soon. You do you, support him and cherish him. But Please understand that 6TOB supporters are also right in their own way and it is their choice to support Ilhoon or not.
For 6TOB supporters, please understand that we love all the members equally, we support them and stand by you in supporting their activities. We will work hard but the only difference between you and us will be that you will say the fanchant as it is now with only 6 members but we will mention Jung Ilhoon in our hearts.
To all melodies, Yejiapsa💙 and Hwaiting!!!! Stay safe and be healthy all of you. We are a family so let’s keep our differences apart and stay together as a family. Differences in opinion shouldn’t bring a difference in our love for each other.
So that’s it, hope you liked my post. Thank you for reading it.
So until the next time…
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